How I See The World Because I Can’t See Colors

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Hi, everyone. I’m Darya, and I live in LA. Please like and subscribe.

I was born to loving parents who adored me, and two years later, my sister Caroline arrived. And even though we were sisters, we looked nothing alike. For starters, I had long, beautiful hair which my mom loved and would spend hours combing. As for Caroline, she was blessed with curly hair that usually looks like a bird’s nest, but she didn’t have a worry in the world. Growing up, I always noticed how my parents were two opposites of a magnet. Mom was strict and careful with money. Dad was a free spirit and always lived in the moment, and I loved him for that.

One time, all four of us visited the museum and it was there I saw the most amazing thing ever. Lockheed Vega, Amelia Earhart’s plane. I had read about her in my history class and was totally fascinated by her. 

– (Darya) Dad. PSST, Dad. I want a picture inside the plane. 

– (Dad) Inside? It’s not allowed.

– (Darya) Pretty please.

– (Dad) Fine. But promise to share your kiddie meal because your mom won’t let me have another one.

– (Darya) Deal!

Well, while Mom and Caroline were busy listening to the tour guide, Dad and I sneaked and took pictures in the legendary aircraft, and it was amazing!

– (Darya) Dad, I want to be like her and fly airplanes. 

– (Dad) Oh, you want to be a pilot, honey. That’s so nice. 

Since then, Dad would show me movies on pilots, flying, and everything related to it. I so wanted to be like Amelia. Things were fine, until one day, my parents noticed something was wrong with my eye. They immediately took me to the doctor and I was diagnosed with a condition called lazy eye. That meant I had poor vision in just one eye and it would wander to the side. And the best way to fix it was surgery. This made my life very hard at school. For starters, I had to wear big glasses, and then the problem of my wandering eye was there.

– (Friend 1) Are you looking at the board, or the teacher’s butt? 

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– (Darya) No, I’m not. I was looking at…

– (Friend 1) The teacher’s butt! I know! (Laughs) 

I so hated when people did this to me. Mom began saving every penny for my surgery, which would happen when I was 10. But luck was against us. Dad lost his job. Even though he tried

to find another job, he just couldn’t and soon he just gave up, and we’d see him sitting on the couch all day playing video games. It got difficult for Mom to take care of the three of us with just her salary, and they would fight almost every day. But one night, their fight got very loud and I heard a knock at my door.

– (Caroline) Darya, can I stay in your room? I am scared. 

– (Darya) Oh, no, Caroline, you don’t have to be scared. I’m right here, and I promise I will always be there for you. Okay? Now why don’t we have some fun! 

Caroline and I played and jumped up and down on the bed. It was so fun! We talked the night away and I told her about my dream to become a pilot. 

– (Caroline) Will you take me on the plane with you? 

– (Darya) Of course. I’ll even let you sit next to me and take you to different places. 

When I turned 13, Mom had finally saved enough money for my surgery and I was so happy. To celebrate, Dad said he would get me a surprise. I love surprises. This was one of the best days ever.

– (Dad) Congratulations, Darya. 

– (Mom) What’s wrong, honey? It’s your fave… 

– (Darya) That’s one ugly cake. I said red velvet, not carrot cake. 

– (Caroline) It is red velvet, dumbo. Taste it. 

– (Darya) It is. But an ugly one. 

– (Caroline) Boohoo, you didn’t get a pretty cake. Can we just eat now? I gotta go for practice. Ugh, forget it. I’ll eat later. 

That was somewhat rude of her. But as we were growing up, I realized how Caroline had begun to get distant. I talked to Dad about it and he said it was just a phase and how she was so much into sports.

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I did miss the younger, naive Caroline, but thank God I had Keisha, my neighbor and best friend. She knew all my secrets, including my big fat crush on the school’s hottest guy, Jason. The guy was everything a girl could ever dream of. Plus, he was in a band, too. So hot, right? 

– (Keisha) Darya, you should totally tell him about your crush. 

– (Darya) So that he’ll see me as one of his fangirls? No, thank you. 

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– (Keisha) Oh, come on. He won’t see you that way. You better tell him soon or I will.(Giggles) Kidding! 

That evening, when I got back home from school, I saw Mom and Dad arguing, again. So what’s this one about?

– (Darya) Ooh, let me guess. Dad over overslept. Wait, wait, he got another parking ticket. Ooh, I know. He burned dinner. 

– (Caroline) Nah, this time Dad spent the electricity bill on food for him and his friends when they came over to watch the cricket match. Can you believe it?

– (Darya) That’s a new one. Perfect! Now the power is cut! 

Well, things didn’t change over the next few years. And when I was 17, Mom announced she would have to move to Dubai because she had a really good job offer there. We decided that Caroline and I would stay back with Dad and finish our studies here. 

– (Darya) Dubai? Won’t you miss us? 

– (Mom) Of course I will. I know you can handle things here. I trust you, sweetie. Plus, I’ll be back in a while. 

After Mom left, everything was on my shoulder. It was unfair, and I sort of resented her for that. Good job opportunity or bad, how could she just leave? I was pretty upset. But when Dad stepped up, things got better. He spent most of his time taking care of us, which was unusual, but I loved it. After I was done with high school, I was excited and started saving money for the pilot training program, but I was still falling short. 

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– (Keisha) Uh, Darya, why don’t you just borrow from your mom? Or maybe Caroline? 

– (Darya) Oh, Mom said she will give, but I can’t ask her for the entire amount. And Caroline, she won’t give it up so easily. She keeps an account of everything. She’s a little weird in that way. 

– (Keisha) So, why don’t you take it and give it back later? She doesn’t have to know. 

– (Darya) Borrow? From Caroline? Hmm. 

I didn’t want to, but I was out of options. So I borrowed some cash from Caroline’s safe box and pretended like nothing was wrong. I’ll bring it back soon. Just a few weeks later when I

got home from my part-time job, I saw Caroline having a yelling competition with Dad. 

– (Darya) What in the world was happening? Caroline. What’s going on? 

– (Caroline) Well, I was missing a big chunk of money recently and it turns out Dad stole it. 

– (Darya) No way. Why would he? 

– (Caroline) He walked in with gifts for us. Expensive ones! Where would he get the money from? 

– (Dad) How can you accuse me of doing something like this? I saved this. 

– (Caroline) Yeah, right. You “save money”? You don’t know the s of save, Dad. 

Caroline stormed out of there and I saw a Dad staring at me. Later, Mom found out, and it got even worse. I felt extremely guilty and wanted to tell Caroline everything, but I couldn’t. The guilt was eating me. And one day, I just wanted to be out of the house away from everything. So Keisha and I went to a cafe where we ran into someone I never thought I would meet, Jason! 

– (Jason) Hey, Darya. I haven’t seen your pretty face in so long. Uh… I don’t know why I just said that. Um, I mean, it’s been so long.

– (Darya) (Giggles) Jason, it’s so nice to see you here. 

Why was my voice going so high? Since that day, Jason and I had been constantly texting and calling, and soon we became really good friends. I even confessed my elephant-sized crush on him, and he said he liked me too. 

 

A couple of weeks later, I invited Jason for Caroline’s birthday. After all of her friends had left, it was just the four of us and Dad and we decided to watch a movie. But Caroline was still not talking to Dad so he left saying he was feeling tired. I felt so bad for him. The guilt was eating me alive. I wanted to confess to Caroline immediately, but the outfits worn by the actors distracted me. 

– (Darya) Oh, that’s a lovely design. Maybe if the dress was in red and not orange, it would have looked better. 

– (Caroline) What are you talking about? That dress is red. Do you need glasses now, grandma? 

– (Darya) Oh, shush. But that is orange, right?

– (Jason) Uh, no, it’s red. Like really bright red.

– (Keisha) Maybe the contrasting color looks different from the angle you’re sitting at? 

– (Darya) Yeah, maybe. 

But I let this go and focused on my tests for the pilot training. But when it was time for the vision test, I was left in shock. I had color blindness. 

– (Darya) But I got my eyes fixed! And had surgery! 

– (Doctor) Uh, this happens a lot. Color blindness can often go unnoticed. But look at the bright side, it’s just partial color blindness. 

– (Darya) Just partial? This cannot be happening. Does this mean I still can be a pilot? 

– (Doctor) I’m afraid you can’t. I’m sorry. 

I ran out of there and locked myself in my room as soon as I got home. This was single-handedly one of the worst days of my life. To add to this, all Mom did was call and talk to me for a little while because she had to rush to a meeting. It’s like she didn’t even care! I was beginning to hate my life. I was sick of staying at home and decided to go over to Keisha’s place, and even bought our favorite milkshakes on my way. But I was not prepared for what I saw. 

– (Keisha) Oh, my God. Darya! 

– (Darya) Are you freaking kidding me? 

– (Jason) Darya? 

– (Darya) How could you do this to me? 

– (Jason) Let me explain. 

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– (Darya) I wasn’t talking to you. You can’t even look at your face. Keisha, how could you? 

– (Keisha) You weren’t dating him. I liked him too, since high school. And before I knew it, we kissed at Caroline’s birthday. 

– (Darya) Hold up! At my sister’s party? Under my roof? And you, you sat next to me and held my hand while watching the movie. You know what? I don’t need a backstabbing friend like you and a jerk. I’ll pass. You both deserve each other. 

I was fuming with anger, and I’m pretty sure I looked like a steam engine. I threw the milkshake at them and stormed out of there. I could have all contact with both Keisha and Jason and avoided them. I felt so betrayed. Why was all this happening to me? My life was the worst. Before I knew it, Mom ended up coming back to check up on me. 

– (Darya) Wow, look who decided to show up. Finally got some time off of your work to check on your family? 

– (Mom) Don’t talk to me that way, Darya. Do you have any idea how much I’ve been through? 

– (Darya) And what about what I’ve been through, huh? You didn’t show up when I got to know about my color blindness. Instead, you showed up now. Because I’m acting sad? I just hate you. 

I saw the look of shock on Mom’s face before I was being dragged out of the house by Caroline. w

– (Caroline) What is wrong with you? Why are you acting this way? 

– (Darya) Like, I just hate how my life has turned out. I went through so much. This awful eye condition, Mom abandoning us, and now Jason and Keisha. 

– (Caroline) Oh, my God. Shut up. She didn’t abandon us. And, what, some boy problems? Grow up. Everyone has problems. Did you know I actually failed my exams when Mom left? Instead of crying and making a scene, I decided to do better, and I did. And when Dad stole the money, I lost my mind. Do you know why I was saving that money? To buy these new shoes for football so that I could perform well and get the scholarship. But I couldn’t, and I lost it. 

Oh, my god. What have I done? 

– (Darya) Caroline, I…I have to tell you something. It wasn’t Dad who stole your money. It was me. I am so so sorry. I…

Before I could complete my sentence, Caroline slapped me across the face. 

– (Caroline) You selfish, selfish person! Are you happy? Ruining my life, my relationship with Dad? You know what? I’m glad Keisha and Jason are together. You don’t deserve to be happy for what you did. 

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– (Darya) Caroline, please listen! 

Since that day, Caroline had refused to speak to me. I apologize to Dad and Mom for what I did. Especially Dad. 

– (Darya) I should have said something that day, Dad. I wasn’t… I wasn’t strong enough.

– (Dad) You know, I had seen you take the money from Caroline’s safe, but I wanted you to tell her yourself. What you did was hard for me to believe. But I am glad that you came clean. In the end, that’s what counts.

Mom and Dad didn’t forgive me right away, but eventually they did. However, my sister didn’t. Every time I tried to talk to her, Caroline acted as if I didn’t even exist. Dad told me to give her some time, and I did. 

A couple of months had passed and I was still at home with no idea what I’d do with my future. But one day, Dad gave me the brochures of some universities. 

– (Dad) So what you can’t fly a plane, you can help people build one.

– (Darya) Aircraft engineer? Why didn’t I think of… Thanks a lot, Dad. I’ll apply for it. 

I did. And the day my acceptance letter arrived, I was over the moon and there was only one person I wanted to tell this to, Caroline. I decided to get her those shoes, but once again, I was short on cash. But then I had the best idea. Once I had the shoes, I put them outside Caroline’s room and waited for her to see. 

– (Darya) Do you forgive me? 

– (Caroline) Hmm, I’m still mad at you, but thank you for this. Uh, why are you wearing a cap? Ah! What did you do?

– (Darya) Uh, I sort of sold my hair. Ah, don’t worry. It’ll grow back. I’m just happy that you

were happy. 

– (Caroline) I can’t believe you did this for me. Thank you so much, Darya.

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